All In The Family
by Lolsome-o-sis girl
Summary: [AU ONESHOT; Three-Word Challenge] In which Jathro spends time with his step family, primarily his step siblings, and sees that arguing is probably one of their favourite past-times.


**All In The Family**

_Fandom: Wizards Vs Aliens_

_Rating: K+_

_Genre: Family, Humor_

_Pairing: None_

_Word count: __915_

_Summary: [AU ONESHOT; Three-Word Challenge] In which Jathro spends time with his step family, primarily his step siblings, and sees that arguing is probably one of their favourite past-times._

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><p><strong>AN: No TomLexi this time - Instead, I decided to do the Three-Word Challenge (if that's what it's called), where I had three random words/objects/things in general, and I had to include them in a fanfiction somehow. I got my friends from school to pick words, and this is what I came up with!**** Enjoy.**

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><p><strong>DISCLAIMER. I do not own Wizards Vs Aliens.<strong>

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><p><strong>Write a fanfic for any fandom, and include these wordsobjects: **

_Broomstick_

_Spanner_

_Steak knife._

**Challenge Accepted.**

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><p>"Lexi! Hurry up!" Jathro banged on the door. "We've been waiting for ages, and the party starts in, like, fifteen minutes!"<p>

Lexi rolled her eyes at her step brother's impatience, taking one last look in the full-length mirror in the door of her wardrobe. The last time that she'd seriously celebrated Halloween was when she was ten, but, as soon as it had gone around the grapevine that the town hall was putting on a Halloween party, Jathro had been insistent, even though Lexi was certain that it wouldn't be any fun, particularly not for those of their age group. But, Jathro was Jathro; he could never resist a party, after all. He'd all but had to strangle Lexi to get her into her costume (which consisted of a black shirt, skirt and fluorescent stripy tights); she would have been much happier to have stayed indoors with a bowl of popcorn and a scary movie, but, of course, Jathro was having none of it.

Brushing a strand of blonde hair from her face, Lexi knocked her witch hat askew (trying to make it clear how she felt about this whole situation) and grabbed her Tesco-bought broomstick, which had been casually been resting by her bedroom door for the past two days, and stepped out into the hallway, only to come face to face with a scarlet-stained face and...a steak knife?

"Jathro!" She yelped, jerking back. "What the -!?"

"Isn't it great?" Jathro beamed. "I worked on this costume all week!"

"Is that a steak knife?"

A pause. "...No!"

"_Jathro..._"

"Okay, maybe!"

She backed away slightly. "What the heck are you supposed to be, anyway?"

"Zombie slayer. I thought that was obvious. Y'know, with the paint and the weapon...?" He tailed off, looking slightly less cheerful than he had a few seconds previously.

Lexi was still dubiously eyeing the steak knife in question. "How did you ever get away with buying that?"

"I didn't."

"Your mother will have a fit when she finds out that you stole that from her kitchen."

"Again, I didn't. Your brother let me borrow it from _your_ kitchen."

"Oh, he did, did he?"

"Well...I say _let_..." Jathro shuffled. "He was too busy talking to his girlfriend, so I figured that he wouldn't mind."

Lexi huffed. Honestly. And their father had left Varg in charge, the "responsible" one! "Give me the knife."

His face changed to that of a pleading five year old. "Oh, but, _Le _-!"

"I don't care. I'm not having you arrested on Halloween; we'll both be grounded for life. Give it to me."

"Fine." He gingerly handed her the steak knife. "But, when we're left weaponless against the zombie attack, don't you start pointing the finger at me."

"Noted." It would be Varg that she'd blame for letting someone as feckless as Jathro loose with a steak knife (bless his little cotton socks). In fact, she was on her way to blame him right now.

She threw open the kitchen door as she marched down the stairs; it banged against the sideboard, interrupting her brother, who was perched on the kitchen counter, talking into his phone. Her eyes narrowed.

"What were you thinking letting Jathro sneak off with the steak knife?" She demanded, placing the object back in the dish rack. The phone next to her brother's ear buzzed as someone spoke to him from the other end of the line.

"I'll call you back," he replied after a moment, before ending the call with a sigh. "What are you babbling on about now, sister?"

"Dad left you in charge; the least you can do is make sure that Jathro doesn't get himself arrested!" She glared at him. "I thought you'd reached the age of maturity, brother. Clearly I was wrong."

"Do you honestly think I _want_ to spend my evening watching you and our step brother ruin every ounce of enjoyment in sight with your irritating voices and mindless chattering?"

"Whatever. Stay here, then. Don't bother child-minding us tonight. We'll probably have a nicer time without you."

"Sure. Of course I would leave you to your own devices again, Lexi. Can't you remember what happened last time? It was lucky I came home early, or the house would have burned down!" Lexi folded her arms across her chest, trying not to cringe as she re-lived the memory. Not her finest moment in her seventeen years of life.

"Like I care what you do."

"You should do."

"Well, I don't."

"Well, you _should_!"

"Well, I _don't_!"

"Don't what?" Jathro was leaning against the kitchen door frame, bored of waiting patiently in the hallway whilst the siblings shouted at each other. "What's the delay about now?"

"Nothing." Lexi fired off a glare at her brother. "Varg's just being an idiot. As per usual."

"Child."

She stuck her tongue out at him, in a very child-like manner. "Ass."

"Okay, you two." Jathro held up his hands. "Maybe we should -" He was drowned out by Varg's comeback.

"Immature."

"Egotistical!"

"Moron!"

"Oxygen thief!"

"Oxygen thief?" Both Jathro and Varg raised an eyebrow.

"Yes. Because we're all wasting oxygen on you!"

"You know, it really is fun watching you try to fit _all_ of your vocabulary into _one_ sentence, dear sister."

"Spanner." Lexi turned on her heel and ducked out of the kitchen, yanking her coat off the hook in the hallway, calling to Jathro over her shoulder. "Now, come on, are we going to this stupid party or not?"

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><p><strong>Can anyone else imagine this happening, or is it just me? Like, Jathro would be the peacemaker and Lexi and Varg would just ignore him and carry on bickering?<strong>


End file.
